Monday, April 21, 2008

The Big Gouge

I read today on CNN that gas prices ROSE TO A RECORD $3.50 A GALLON!

...And I'm thinking BFD, you retards, gas here is over $4.00/gal here. I woke up this morning and gas was literally $0.20/gal more than yesterday. Is it different today somehow? Is there 5% less gas today than yesterday?

At this rate by the time John is 20, we'll be welding spikes onto our bumpers and looking for this guy to drive the fuel trucks.

Yeah, ouch

For some odd reason I was surfing on YouTube last night and stumbled across a treasure trove of people videoing themselves doing really, REALLY stupid things with guns. Among these of course were a gaggle of tiny petite woman (and men, and children for god's sake) firing something like a Desert Eagle with no idea of how hard it would kick, and the barrel blowing straight back into their faces. The most amazing, however, is the ricochet that this guy catches in the HEAD from a Barrett .50 caliber anti-tank rifle. I said holy crap.

Friday, April 18, 2008

Grandma and Grandpa visit!

My parents made the long trek down to Chicago for a visit last week to hang out with us and play with John, whom they hadn't seen in about five months. Loads of fun was had by all. We got some great photos this time:
Breakfast at the Hilton Garden

Whoa, some of Daddy's old toys! These look like they were in a time capsule since roughly 1984...

Letting go of a blue baloon for baby Ethan (

Grandma and Grandpa love to read.

Taking a swim with Grandpa in the pool. Splash!

Holy cow, I'm tired.

Swinging at the park on a marginally-nice day.


Grandma and John.

Daddy, Mommy, and John

The first rule of Copier Smash club is...

You do not talk about Copier Smash club.

Our office had a brutally uncooperative Konica Minolta copier that hobbled along on its last legs for a painfully long time, incurring loads of downtime and repair costs along the way until we could finally get a new one. Strangely, the removal/recycle options were limited, so we decided to recycle it ourselves.

With a baseball bat.

Tuesday, April 01, 2008

You know it's been a long miserable winter when...

- I don't post for almost a month.

- I start listening to smooth jazz because it's uplifting.

- I start taking vitamins again to stave off the inevitible Seasonal Affect Disorder that comes from not seeing the sun for weeks at a time.

- I remark to others that this is the first winter in Chicago that reminds me of NNY.

- I feel a crass, savage satisfaction at this YouTube video of George Bush throwing out the first pitch at the Washington National's game to the sound of roaring "boo"s.

Not all is crap though, John has been growing so fast it almost can't be called growing, it's more like some time-lapse version of evolving. One day he can say "2", "8", "9" and "10" and it seems like the next thing you know he can say all the numbers and most of the letters. He knows the names of most of the significant Disney characters and of course Thomas the Tank Engine. He has discovered the word "no", but doesn't really understand what it means. He'll run around and shout "no, no NO!" at random, and I'll reply by saying "Yes!" and he'll run around and yell "Yes, yes YES!" He still loves playing in pillow forts and he has taken a newfound interest in trains in particular. We bought him a combo playset with a golf club, baseball bat, and basketball hoop and several small balls and he took to it instantly. He sleeps with the tiny cudgel-shaped baseball bat sometimes. I imagine my parents are hearing echoes of Beam-Beam the rubber hammer that I used to carry around when I was his age.

I find that many experiences of parenthood that are foretold decades ahead of time by your own parents ("hope you have a baby just like you", "save these for when your own kids are grown"), are either bunk or don't happen the way you think they will. One that's about to actually happen, though, is that my parents are bringing... (drumroll)... my old Matchbox cars and Legos for John to play with. Now I haven't seen these toys in something like 20 years, so I'm sort of gearing up for what that's going to feel like. John has some of the bigger Duplo Legos that we bought him, including a set with a Thomas train, and he loves them. The smaller ones are too grown up for him at the moment, but another year or so and he'll be ready to rock with them.

And it's true what they say that suddenly your tiny little squalling bundle of baby is a little person that starts indicating or flatly telling you that they want a specific book or a specific food, and this is every bit as surreal as parents make it out to be.